Showing posts with label divorce. Show all posts
Showing posts with label divorce. Show all posts

Tuesday, October 7, 2025

Top reasons for divorce

The top reasons for divorce are complex and most couples cite multiple causes for the decision to divorce.

Top-reasons-for-divorce.png

Top reasons for divorce according to the National Library of Medicine are:

75% Lack of commitment
60% Infidelity or extramarital affairs
58% Conflict and arguing
45% Married too young
37% Financial problems
35% Substance abuse
24% Domestic violence
18% Lack of support from family
17% Health problems
13% Religious differences
13% Little or no premarital education

  • National Library of Medicine. List of Major Reasons for Divorce by Individuals and Couples Who Participated in PREP

After a Lack of Commitment and Infidelity, here are the next three top reasons for divorce

58% of couples report excessive conflict and arguing
45% believe they married too young
37% report financial problems as a major reason for divorce

You can see by the statistics that It’s typical for there to be multiple reasons for a divorce. Couples face many challenges in marriage. But over 69% of divorcing couples report that there is one "last straw" that pushes them over the edge and causes them to make the final decision to divorce their spouse.

The most common “Last Straw” causing divorce is infidelity, domestic violence, and substance abuse. When there was a last straw event, 24% of couples reported that infidelity was the catalyst for their divorce, 21% of couples reported domestic violence as the ultimate cause, while 12% said substance abuse was the deciding factor to divorce.

The Top Reasons for Divorce Explained

Lack of Commitment Is the #1 Top Reason for Divorce

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A whopping 75% of all respondents cited a lack of commitment as the primary reason for their divorce.

What a sad commentary on our society that lack of commitment is the #1 reason for divorce. To begin with, many of us make a vow to each other and to God that we will love and stay with our spouse no matter what, until death separates us. Honoring that commitment sets the standard for unconditional love and forgiveness in a marriage. It also requires a lot of hard work!

Unfortunately, a great number of people aren’t willing to do the work necessary to build a good marriage. They think that love is a feeling instead of understanding that love is a choice, followed by actions, which lead to feelings of love. Feelings come and go depending on circumstances and other factors. Love and commitment are a choice.

You chose to marry your spouse because you loved them and wanted to spend your life with them. Hopefully you were wise and mature enough to realize that in every marriage there will be times of hurt, anger, disappointment, and difficulty. Overcoming those challenges is part of living out your commitment to your marriage and your spouse.

Marriages can be impacted when married couples experience poor communication, a lack of compromise, or the absence of kindness, empathy, trust, and respect in their marriages.

But to be clear, the success of the marriage requires both partners to be committed to the marriage. If one partner wants out, there’s no legal way to prevent a divorce proceeding. All too often, people find themselves in a life-changing divorce regardless of their belief system or efforts to save their marriage.

Another reason for lack of commitment is that many couples believe that divorce is the easiest way out of a difficult situation or relationship. In most cases, nothing could be further from the truth. Divorce affects every aspect of your life; lack of companionship, financial stress, shared responsibilities, children, where you live, lifestyle, family and friends, etc..

Infidelity is the #2 Top Reason for Divorce

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Over 60% of couples cited a partner’s Infidelity as the reason their marriage union ended in divorce. Forgiveness of infidelity is one of the hardest betrayals for couples to work through. A marriage is supposed to be monogamous. When one spouse fails to honor this boundary and commitment trust is lost, and the marriage is usually destroyed.

Couples in marriages that experience infidelity usually end up divorced unless they seek help to restore those marriages. Couples that reach out for help greatly reduce the chance of ending up divorced.

If you need help working through and forgiving your spouse for having an affair, go to the following article: How to forgive Someone.

Constant arguing and conflict is the #3 Top Reason for Divorce

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Excessive arguments compounded by poor conflict resolution skills can take a heavy toll on the relationship and lead couples to divorce. It amazes me how much we as a society are willing to invest in our physical health and appearance, but refuse to invest the time and effort necessary to learn better communication and conflict resolution skills to enhance and strengthen our marriage.

Marrying too young is the #4 Top Reason for Divorce

Getting married at a young age, can put you at a higher percentage risk for a divorce. You’ll likely still be developing key aspects of your personality and views about life. People grow and change as they age and mature, so it’s important for couples to grow together.

Signs that you may be growing apart from your partner can include no shared interests, having different life goals, and feelings of loneliness within the marriage. Growing apart can easily result in ending up divorced.

You can’t change the past if you married too young. But you can determine your future by working hard towards better communication and conflict resolution skills, building shared interests or hobbies, dating, supporting each other emotionally and working together towards shared goals. Spend time with couples that have healthy marriages that you would like to emulate.

Financial problems are the #5 Top Reason for Divorce

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Unresolved financial challenges are a leading cause of marital conflict. Financial stress is hard on any marriage. So, it’s important to establish reasonable expectations that both of you can live with regarding money management and financial planning goals.

You should discuss who will pay the bills, how major financial decisions will be made, develop a budget, and learn the basics of money management before you get married. This can be especially difficult if one spouse is a “spender”, and the other is a “saver”. It’s an absolute catastrophe if both of you are big spenders but not big earners!

Substance abuse is the #6 Top Reason for Divorce

Another important factor to consider is if your future or current spouse shows any signs of an addictive personality. An addiction to drugs, alcohol, pornography, or gambling can drastically endanger your marriage. Take these warning signs seriously because the ramifications of these addictions often lead to divorce. If you’re already married get professional help asap.

Forgiving an addict is one of the most difficult situations to offer forgiveness in. They typically lie, steal and break trust repeatedly, destroying the relationships they have with others daily. At the very least, they break promises to themselves and family to give up whatever addiction is destroying their life. Very few marriages survive this. You do not want to go down this path.

Domestic Abuse is the #7 Top Reason for Divorce

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Domestic abuse is a serious and dangerous crime. But nearly one out of every four divorces (24% in total) cite domestic abuse as a cause of divorce. Domestic violence can be any pattern of abusive behavior that’s used to intimidate or maintain power and control over the other spouse. In situations where legitimate abuse is a factor, the victim will need a strong attorney to represent them to ensure their safety and to negotiate on their behalf.

Unfortunately, claiming domestic abuse can also be used as a weapon against an innocent spouse or partner. According to court records, over 50% of all domestic violence claims made during the divorce process lack enough evidence to prove the assertion.

Lack of family support is the #8 Top Reason for Divorce

If your family doesn’t agree with your choice of a marriage partner, this can cause a deep rift in your relationship with your spouse. Many a married couple has ended up divorced because of problems with family.

Your family might exclude your partner, disrespect them, or in some cases cut you off from family events and connections because of your choice. This will likely cause feelings of isolation, loneliness, and grief because of lost connections. Many find this pressure difficult to manage, which could cause them to consider divorce as an option.

Health problems is the #9 Top Reason for Divorce

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There are so many difficult marital issues that arise from health problems. Mental illness in the form of a severe personality can precipitate a divorce. This can adversely affect every area of the marriage relationship. Infertility can lead to divorce. Couples that face challenges having children are more likely to divorce if having a large family is important for one or both partners.

An accident or deteriorating health that limits the ability for physical intimacy or creates a demand for intensive caregiving by the healthy spouse can also lead to ending up divorced.

Religious differences are the #10 Top Reason for Divorce

Religious differences will affect people with a strong faith and core beliefs that actually influence their decisions about marriage, child rearing, finances and many other important areas of life. Religion can be an extremely import factor for most married couples.

Christians are warned in scripture not to marry someone that doesn’t share their faith in Jesus Christ. This is not to limit their choices, but to protect them from the inevitable conflicts that will occur if they marry someone that doesn’t share their faith and the principles that they live by and hold dear.

Regardless of what your religious beliefs are, be sure to marry someone that shares your beliefs and core values. Never marry them hoping to change them once you’re married. Many couples have ended up divorced by making this mistake.

Little premarital education and preparation is the #11 Top Reason for Divorce

Many couples avoid important conversations about how their marriage will work after they are married. There are two main reasons for this. The first is that they are in love and figure “it will all work out”. The second is that one or both want to avoid conflict.

Not discussing marriage expectations related to faith, having children, parenting roles, careers, spousal roles, finances, where you hope to live, and desired lifestyles will only delay difficult discussions. But another thing it will rob you of is the insight gained from experiencing how your intended spouse communicates and resolves conflict. It’s one thing for them to share their philosophy about these things and quite another to work through them in the real world.

Telling yourself that “things will be better after you’re married” is a sure sign that you shouldn’t be marrying this person. At least not until you’ve worked through things to the point that you’re confident in your choice.
The last thing you want, is to end up like a large percent of divorced couples because you avoided really knowing the person until after you married them. It’s way better to have never married the wrong person than to end up divorced.

Interesting facts about divorce

How Many Marriages End in Divorce?

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Reportedly, approximately 50% of all first-time marriages end in divorce. That divorce rate varies between 40-50 percent. Second and third marriages fail at a much higher rate. The divorce rate for second marriages is 67 percent. And 73 percent of third marriages end in divorce.

These statistics seem to indicate that unless someone that has experienced a divorce does the work to figure out what went wrong in their first marriage, they simply take the baggage of that failed relationship with them into the next. This may be as simple as modifying your selection criteria to result in a better choice of a future partner. But you will also need to assess how you can improve yourself to be a better marriage partner should that opportunity arise.

Almost 70% of Divorces Are Initiated by Women

Women are far more likely to initiate a divorce than men. Nearly 7 in 10 divorces are initiated by the female partner in heterosexual relationships. People speculate on why the divorce rate percent is so much higher for women than men, but this percentage can be affected by multiple factors and no single one stands out.

Couples that Live Together prior to Marriage Are More Likely to Divorce

Living together before marriage seems to be a significant predictor of a future divorce. A total of 57% of couples who didn’t live together before marriage had a marriage that lasted 20 years or more. Only 46 percent of those who lived together before marriage lasted as long.

Most Couples Report not Understanding the Realities of a Marriage relationship

One of the leading factors contributing to divorce is a lack of knowledge about what a successful marriage relationship requires. In fact, 70 percent of couples reported they didn't really understand the level of effort, commitment, and compromise necessary to build a strong marriage before they got married.

All too often, they went into marriage hoping that their partner would “make them happy”. And they commonly thought that love was a feeling. Feelings come and go, but the commitment to love someone is a choice. But that choice and the consistent supporting actions because of that choice will lead to feelings of love.

Summary of top reasons for divorce

Lack of commitment, infidelity, arguing, immaturity, and financial pressures are some of the top reasons for divorce. But most of the time, there are multiple factors that contribute to the decision to divorce.

The good news revealed by all this information is if you’re still married you should now realize that your marriage doesn’t have to end in divorce. Much of what you’re going through is common to many marriages. And more importantly, there are positive steps you can take to guard against the most common reasons for divorce.

If you’re already divorced, this information will help guide you through an honest self-examination to learn from mistakes and develop better skills and expectations if you enter another relationship. This will greatly increase the likelihood of a successful marriage and decrease the fear of ending up divorced in the future.

Getting help for a better marriage

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If you would like help avoiding or recovering from a divorce you can find valuable resources at Keeping Families Connected. There are personal growth resources that cover the following topics:

Section #1: Faith
Section #2: Healing from the devastating effects of divorce
Section #3: Dealing with your emotions and getting rid of baggage
Section #4: Marriage – don’t fall into old patterns with a new spouse
Section #5: Parenting skills
Section #6: Helping your children through divorce
Section #7: Parental Alienation
Section #8: Going deeper in your faith
Section #9: Music

More good news. There is hope. Most divorces are preventable if both partners are willing to spend the time and effort necessary to work on the marriage. There are many great resources, books, marriage retreats, counselors and clergy that can help.

None of the top reasons for divorce has the power to destroy your marriage unless you or your spouse refuses to work toward a better marriage.

Tuesday, January 4, 2022

Feeling heartbroken? A simple technique can help heal your heart

Are you feeling heartbroken? Yet another relationship is over, leaving you sad and hopeless about your future love life. You question your ability to “do relationship†and wonder if you will ever be able to love and be loved again.

Don’t despair. I know exactly how you feel and how to get out of it.

I have been there, several times, and I know how hard it is to believe it will get better.

At first, you may feel unlovable, or think you are not good enough, as your self-worth most likely has taken a dive. Those feelings may reflect themselves in other aspects of your life too, like your work and health. You are not as productive anymore. Your energy levels are low, and you feel like you don’t want to get out of bed, because life is so hopeless. A terrible feeling, isn’t it?

The good news is: “There is a way to get out of this… AND IT’S EASIER THAN YOU THINKâ€

When I was at my lowest, EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique) tapping was one of the things that could make me feel better instantly. At the end of the first session with myself, I had eliminated most feelings of worthlessness and started to feel a little less helpless again. By the third session, I had regained my self-esteem and self-confidence. I could start being productive and start living life again. By the end of the fifth session, I had stopped obsessing  about my ex and began focusing on my personal development and transformation.

From then on, my whole life has been transforming for the better (although in all fairness, it is not always a straight line up, I do want to be honest about that).

That’s when I decided I wanted to help other women going through a breakup or divorce to heal their heart and become whole again.

Check out my website to learn more about my story and how I can support you. 

Erna Hoek 

heal broken heart

Tuesday, September 14, 2021

Property and Asset Division in Divorce Cases

In every divorce case, no matter the circumstance of the parties, there will be a division of assets. Many individuals believe this is a basic "split the baby" determination. Nevertheless, that is not constantly the case. For checking account and joint debts, you might be able to do that. Nevertheless, when it pertains to retirement accounts, real estate, and service payments, the formula is not that basic. Each of these categories has its own distinct set of issues, and you will absolutely require an attorney to help you piece this together.


Retirement Accounts and Pensions

In cases where separating parties have retirement accounts or pensions, those assets are subject to division as part of the divorce as they are considered marital property. Nevertheless, pension and retirement accounts are considered and divided in a different way, and there are methods to make sure that you are getting present day, actualized worth for your granted portion. Determining what the "marital portion" of those accounts can frequently be the very first problem. Where the entirety of the value in the accounts has been earned completely throughout the marriage, the problem is basic. Where the asset existed prior to the marital relationship, but cash was placed into or made by the account during the marriage, determining what makes up the "marital part" can become really complicated. A lawyer will assist to make the very best arguments about what makes up "marital assets" in the account, and will also know the proper experts to consult and evaluate the accounts to help make that determination. In most cases, having a specialist carry out an account assessment to identify exactly what amount of cash is marital, can guarantee that you receive the optimum quantity.


First, you need to know the difference in between what are called "defined contribution plans," typically called 401ks, Individual retirement accounts, CMAs, 457b, and 403b strategies, and "specified advantage strategies" which are pensions. With specified contributions, today worth of the account is the "actualized" worth. The problem that occurs is identifying the quantity of that worth that accrued throughout the marriage, if the account was in existence prior to the time of the marital relationship, and if the account existed prior to the marital relationship, is it marital property at all, or does it satisfy the requirements for being thought about "different property." Again, if you have that situation, you must speak to an attorney about these issues.


With defined contribution plans, an expert can determine the worth of the marital and non-marital parts and provide an opinion on the marital part's worth that undergoes division. With defined benefit plans, or pensions, things can become much more complex. In numerous divorces, the primary payee of the pension has actually not retired, and will not retire for a long time. As a result, you can not merely identify today worth of the strategy. A specialist is needed to figure out the actualized worth of the account at the time the primary payee will get the advantage, and just how much of that value will be awarded to the alternate payee. Any boost in the worth of the specified benefit strategy after the date the divorce judgment can be segregated and not consisted of in the future contributions to the strategy. This is usually done by entry of a Qualified Domestic Relations Order, commonly called a QDRO or EDRO.


In either event, you will wish to work with an attorney who can encourage you, and who can put you in touch with the appropriate professionals to correctly carry out such appraisals. Specialist viewpoints are considered very favorably by most Courts in the family law arena, especially when it comes to account and property valuations. The expense of funds to make these determinations is frequently worth the expenditure, for a number of factors, not the least of which is to guarantee that, if your opposing partner works with a professional, and if they are the party with more assets they likely will, you aren't the party on the outside searching in.


Real Property Assessments

Another location where people typically make mistakes are with the sale of real property. Whether you only have your marital home, or you own multiple houses or industrial properties, there are too many people who just take what they paid for the property, minus any liabilities on the property, and decide to use that as the existing worth of the property. That mistake can cost you a substantial amount of cash. A lot of great divorce attorneys will tell you that you must not make a decision about the worth of any real estate that becomes part of the marital estate without taking specific actions. Among those would be to get an appraisal of the property. Good family law lawyers will know a number of appraisers and their preferences about property assessments. Depending upon whether you want the property to be valued high, or low, you will want to go over the appraisal of the property with a lawyer prior to deciding.

You may find that the value of the home from ten years ago when it was purchased has actually substantially increased. If your opposing spouse wishes to keep the house, understanding about that substantial increase can net you a significant increase in your equity buyout. If your home is to be sold, an increase in the worth will result in your getting a bigger share upon sale. In some scenarios, divorcing parties own several houses. In those case, understanding the present values of your houses can help make better choices about offering or keeping some or all of those properties as part of the settlement. In those cases, appraisals and appraisal reports documenting the basis of that appraised worth can be substantial.


The very same can be true, and in some cases more so, if the parties own a business building, or a rental property. Oftentimes, industrial property appraisals lead to significant valuations. In many cases, commercial properties can be worth large sums more than home. In a case we litigated recently, the one-sixth valuation of marital interest in an industrial property deserved more than the one-half value received from the sale of the marital house. Having a commercial appraisal done on the property is very important, and your lawyer can counsel you on how to have one done and on who your finest alternative to utilize for that service might be, given your individual truths and circumstances. Business appraisal reports are generally lengthy, detailing the basis for the appraisers identified worth. In the event of lawsuits, having that report together with the expert's testament can supply a strong basis upon which the Court may rely in making a decision on value. In both situations, it is very important to have a lawyer who can assist you determine the best prepare for protecting your interests and maximizing the value you can get as a result of your property split.


Company Assessments

Numerous divorce litigants do not know that the other partner's service is actually, oftentimes, a marital asset, to which they are entitled to get one half of the worth. Whether it is a dining establishment, medical practice, law firm, or accounting group, oftentimes, the business may be a marital asset that goes through division. While the parties might merely agree on a value to put on the business, doing so usually results in a substantial loss to among the parties in the property split. In these situations in particular, you will require the help of a lawyer, who can help discover a professional to properly review the business, its assets, its debts, profit and loss statements, tax return filings, expenditures and correctly reach a conclusion about the worth of business.


Having an expert and an attorney to do the essential work to discover a proper value on business is of the utmost significance. In most cases, business itself can be the most considerable asset in a divorce matter, and typically parties don't even think about the business as a marital asset. Do not make that error. If either party has a service, whether it is you or the other partner, you are most in need of a lawyer to offer you correct guidance, to try and guarantee that you are not cheated out of your share of marital assets. We have actually managed cases for clients where the difference between having the business assessment and not changed the worth of the estate in our client's favor by hundreds of thousands of dollars. Our experience and connections to the right specialists can assist to make sure that you get the property settlement you are worthy of.


If you are planning to declare divorce, or are already participated in divorce litigation, give us a call. We can assist put a strategy in place that will guarantee you the best possible result as part of your case. At our company we have handled small and large asset divorces, and our method ensures that, whatever the size of your marital estate, we can maximize your result.

Monday, July 26, 2021

Monday, July 19, 2021

Property and Asset Division in Divorce Cases

In every divorce case, no matter the circumstance of the parties, there will be a division of assets. Many individuals believe this is a basic "split the baby" determination. Nevertheless, that is not constantly the case. For checking account and joint debts, you might be able to do that. Nevertheless, when it pertains to retirement accounts, real estate, and service payments, the formula is not that basic. Each of these categories has its own distinct set of issues, and you will absolutely require an attorney to help you piece this together.


Retirement Accounts and Pensions

In cases where separating parties have retirement accounts or pensions, those assets are subject to division as part of the divorce as they are considered marital property. Nevertheless, pension and retirement accounts are considered and divided in a different way, and there are methods to make sure that you are getting present day, actualized worth for your granted portion. Determining what the "marital portion" of those accounts can frequently be the very first problem. Where the entirety of the value in the accounts has been earned completely throughout the marriage, the problem is basic. Where the asset existed prior to the marital relationship, but cash was placed into or made by the account during the marriage, determining what makes up the "marital part" can become really complicated. A lawyer will assist to make the very best arguments about what makes up "marital assets" in the account, and will also know the proper experts to consult and evaluate the accounts to help make that determination. In most cases, having a specialist carry out an account assessment to identify exactly what amount of cash is marital, can guarantee that you receive the optimum quantity.


First, you need to know the difference in between what are called "defined contribution plans," typically called 401ks, Individual retirement accounts, CMAs, 457b, and 403b strategies, and "specified advantage strategies" which are pensions. With specified contributions, today worth of the account is the "actualized" worth. The problem that occurs is identifying the quantity of that worth that accrued throughout the marriage, if the account was in existence prior to the time of the marital relationship, and if the account existed prior to the marital relationship, is it marital property at all, or does it satisfy the requirements for being thought about "different property." Again, if you have that situation, you must speak to an attorney about these issues.


With defined contribution plans, an expert can determine the worth of the marital and non-marital parts and provide an opinion on the marital part's worth that undergoes division. With defined benefit plans, or pensions, things can become much more complex. In numerous divorces, the primary payee of the pension has actually not retired, and will not retire for a long time. As a result, you can not merely identify today worth of the strategy. A specialist is needed to figure out the actualized worth of the account at the time the primary payee will get the advantage, and just how much of that value will be awarded to the alternate payee. Any boost in the worth of the specified benefit strategy after the date the divorce judgment can be segregated and not consisted of in the future contributions to the strategy. This is usually done by entry of a Qualified Domestic Relations Order, commonly called a QDRO or EDRO.


In either event, you will wish to work with an attorney who can encourage you, and who can put you in touch with the appropriate professionals to correctly carry out such appraisals. Specialist viewpoints are considered very favorably by most Courts in the family law arena, especially when it comes to account and property valuations. The expense of funds to make these determinations is frequently worth the expenditure, for a number of factors, not the least of which is to guarantee that, if your opposing partner works with a professional, and if they are the party with more assets they likely will, you aren't the party on the outside searching in.


Real Property Assessments

Another location where people typically make mistakes are with the sale of real property. Whether you only have your marital home, or you own multiple houses or industrial properties, there are too many people who just take what they paid for the property, minus any liabilities on the property, and decide to use that as the existing worth of the property. That mistake can cost you a substantial amount of cash. A lot of great divorce attorneys will tell you that you must not make a decision about the worth of any real estate that becomes part of the marital estate without taking specific actions. Among those would be to get an appraisal of the property. Good family law lawyers will know a number of appraisers and their preferences about property assessments. Depending upon whether you want the property to be valued high, or low, you will want to go over the appraisal of the property with a lawyer prior to deciding.

You may find that the value of the home from ten years ago when it was purchased has actually substantially increased. If your opposing spouse wishes to keep the house, understanding about that substantial increase can net you a significant increase in your equity buyout. If your home is to be sold, an increase in the worth will result in your getting a bigger share upon sale. In some scenarios, divorcing parties own several houses. In those case, understanding the present values of your houses can help make better choices about offering or keeping some or all of those properties as part of the settlement. In those cases, appraisals and appraisal reports documenting the basis of that appraised worth can be substantial.


The very same can be true, and in some cases more so, if the parties own a business building, or a rental property. Oftentimes, industrial property appraisals lead to significant valuations. In many cases, commercial properties can be worth large sums more than home. In a case we litigated recently, the one-sixth valuation of marital interest in an industrial property deserved more than the one-half value received from the sale of the marital house. Having a commercial appraisal done on the property is very important, and your lawyer can counsel you on how to have one done and on who your finest alternative to utilize for that service might be, given your individual truths and circumstances. Business appraisal reports are generally lengthy, detailing the basis for the appraisers identified worth. In the event of lawsuits, having that report together with the expert's testament can supply a strong basis upon which the Court may rely in making a decision on value. In both situations, it is very important to have a lawyer who can assist you determine the best prepare for protecting your interests and maximizing the value you can get as a result of your property split.


Company Assessments

Numerous divorce litigants do not know that the other partner's service is actually, oftentimes, a marital asset, to which they are entitled to get one half of the worth. Whether it is a dining establishment, medical practice, law firm, or accounting group, oftentimes, the business may be a marital asset that goes through division. While the parties might merely agree on a value to put on the business, doing so usually results in a substantial loss to among the parties in the property split. In these situations in particular, you will require the help of a lawyer, who can help discover a professional to properly review the business, its assets, its debts, profit and loss statements, tax return filings, expenditures and correctly reach a conclusion about the worth of business.


Having an expert and an attorney to do the essential work to discover a proper value on business is of the utmost significance. In most cases, business itself can be the most considerable asset in a divorce matter, and typically parties don't even think about the business as a marital asset. Do not make that error. If either party has a service, whether it is you or the other partner, you are most in need of a lawyer to offer you correct guidance, to try and guarantee that you are not cheated out of your share of marital assets. We have actually managed cases for clients where the difference between having the business assessment and not changed the worth of the estate in our client's favor by hundreds of thousands of dollars. Our experience and connections to the right specialists can assist to make sure that you get the property settlement you are worthy of.


If you are planning to declare divorce, or are already participated in divorce litigation, give us a call. We can assist put a strategy in place that will guarantee you the best possible result as part of your case. At our company we have handled small and large asset divorces, and our method ensures that, whatever the size of your marital estate, we can maximize your result.

Tuesday, July 6, 2021

What To Know When Your Divorce Involves Child Custody

Single parent homes have become incredibly typical in America. Today over 23 million children live in a single parent home. Going through a divorce can be challenging, and when a child is involved, it can be much more tough and difficult. If you have a child who is under the age of eighteen, the concern of custody will be a part of your divorce procedures. Since child custody problems are complicated, it deserves knowing all the issues that you can experience. That's what we're going to take a look at today.



How Do You Reach A Custody Arrangement?

If you're going through a divorce, there a number of manner ins which you can reach a custody agreement. It is necessary to make sure that you seek legal recommendations before you take any advances here. You need to be sure that you are making the best choice. When you have done this, you can reach an informal agreement utilizing an arbitrator or with the decision of a judge.


When an agreement has been reached informally, this will result in a binding written legal arrangement. This can have different names consisting of a parenting agreement. The arrangement will be shown to the court where it then becomes a binding contract. At this point, the parents should agree to the terms.


It is possible to reach these kinds of arrangements with no assistance from a lawyer. However, if you want to make sure that you do get custody of a child, this is not advised.


If an attorney is included, this will generally take the kind of a mediation, which takes place outside the courtroom. These scenarios are less adversarial with a neutral party handling disagreements. Each parent and attorney will be offered with an opportunity to make their case, and hopefully, the arrangement will be shaped through team effort. There is a give and take to the proceedings prior to the arbitrator, or neutral party prepares a strategy that will be completed through court.




What If An Agreement Can't Be Reached Through Mediation?

At this moment, custody must be dealt with in court. A family court will figure out the custody plan in this case, and Michigan courts utilize a 'best interest of the child' standard. Ultimately, this just indicates that the child's needs are put initially, nevertheless, the factors that are taken into consideration can vary from court to court.


A few of the factors that can be considered include:


Living situation of individuals parents

Relationship with children

Desire of parent to support their partner

Abuse or neglect

Some courts will likewise think about the child's choice. This usually suggests that an older child will be allowed to voice their viewpoint on who they want to stick with in court. Other courts will look at whether or not the parent can offer a steady lifestyle for the child along with the age of the child in question. Some judges have leaned on the concept that younger children need to be with their mom.




What Are The Types Of Custody Arrangements?

There are a couple of kinds of custody plans that you can argue for or that a judge can decide on:


Physical custody-- This means that a child is enabled to live with you after a divorce. This can be a shared agreement with both parents acquiring this right. Usually, this is typically the preferred technique by the court. It is essential to be conscious that this does not need to be an equal split and one parent can be given custody for most of the time. If parents are unable to settle on a schedule, the judge will set one up.

Sole physical custody just indicates that a child will live fulltime with one parent. While this does provide stability for the child, it can be exceptionally difficult for children to lose the other parent from their life.


Visitation Rights-- In a custody arrangement, there will be a visitation schedule that both parents are legally required to follow. This indicates that parents can not take their child away from their partner without their authorization. In particular cases nevertheless, visitation rights can be restricted for one parent. This is typically the case if there is the threat of harm or an issue with abuse. Visitation rights can be tricky to comprehend, particularly when it comes to the rights of extended member of the family. If you are in any doubt about your rights after a custody agreement, ensure you speak with your attorney.


Legal Custody-- Do be aware that physical custody does not provide legal rights to make decisions about your child's upbringing. For this, legal custody must be offered to an individual parent otherwise it will be shared. This consists of choices on education, religious direction, and healthcare. Normally, shared legal custody is the standard result. Nevertheless, there are cases where one parent will be offered full rights here.




Are There Emotional Issues?

There will always be emotional problems to contend with when a child is part of divorce proceedings. It is essential that they do not feel like a tool in a legal battle which they are not utilized by one parent versus the other. There are a couple of ways you can make your divorce easier for your child. Make certain that you are always respectful of one another through the case. Children must not see you shout, verbally attack each other or threaten violence.


Children are emotionally dependent on the concept of their parent's relationship, especially when they are younger. You must make sure that they know the separation has not been brought on by them and that you both love them regardless of the divorce. Make certain that they are involved in the divorce procedures as little as possible. Do not attempt and motivate them to pick a side as this can cause serious stress and anxiety for the child. It is essential to pick the right lawyer who can guide you through all these issues and make sure that your child is protected from the negative issues of a divorce.


We hope this assists you understand the elements of Child Custody during a divorce case which it permits you to prevent some of the common issues.

Thursday, May 13, 2021

Child Custody Motions – Requirements and Pitfalls

Many people who get separated, whether they have an attorney or not, believe that as soon as the divorce judgment is entered, the case is over. If you do not have children, lot of times that holds true, yet in family law, absolutely nothing is forever. Many Courts won't tell you that, and numerous lawyers that practice family law won't recommend customers regarding the fact that custody, parenting time, child support, and failures to adhere to the terms of a judgment of divorce, in addition to a list of other possible concerns, are all reviewable by a Court and can change, if one party can verify to the Court that an adjustment is necessary. Apart from child and spousal support, one of the most usual post-judgment motion for adjustment of a judgment in family law cases entails custody of a child or multiple children. When these motions are submitted by unrepresented individuals, or by legal representatives that are not aware of family law, they are often unjustifiable or aren't actually requesting a change in custody, however rather, are looking for to boost or reduce one party's parenting time.



What is Child Custody?

While this may appear like an easy or stupid inquiry, it means something very specific in Michigan law, and is often misconstrued by both litigants and attorneys that exercise in this field. In Michigan, the term "custody" is used as the colloquial for what family attorneys called "legal custody." The term "legal custody" in its easiest iteration means, who gets to make significant choices for the child, such as where they most likely to school, should they have a major medical treatment, or where does the child go to church and in what religious denomination should they be raised. Generally, the Courts defer to a joint legal custody model, which permits both moms and dads to have input in these decisions, and require that both parents go over those concerns and agree before a choice is made. Often, what we call legal custody in Michigan is not what people think about initially when they speak about or consider child custody. Most individuals think about who physically has the children with them and for what quantity of time. Informally, this type of custody is known as "physical custody." In Michigan, while several Courts identify motions for adjustments to physical custody, in Michigan, the term "physical custody" is not typically recognized as the appropriate terminology to make use of for this idea. Instead, the Judiciaries and most lawyers who practice in this area, talk about "parenting time," when identifying how much time each parent should have with the minor children.




Evaluating Changes in Child Custody.

Initially, litigants need to understand what they are asking the Court to do. When a parent wishes to make a motion to transform custody, good attorneys will certainly make sure to figure out precisely what it is the customer intends to do. In some cases, a motion to boost or lower parenting time is more appropriate, and in many cases, is a lot easier to show. Sometimes, a party might just want to ask the Court to make a decision on a legal custody problem where the parents can not agree, even though they might generally agree regarding other decisions. Some examples would be a change of school districts (change of schools motion), or a motion for one parent to move more than one hundred miles from the child's current county of residence (change of domicile motion). Much of those sub-categories of change of custody motions have specific and various needs that should be proven to the Court in order for a party to be successful. Nevertheless, when a parent does in fact wish to change legal custody of a child, there is a set of legal procedures that a party should show the Court both in their motion, and, ultimately, with evidence presented at a hearing.




Custody Hearings Need Process and Patience.

Informing the Court that the other party misbehaves and won't agree with you concerning anything is not going to be enough to alter legal custody, even if that is true. The other party will just say you are at fault and the Court will certainly have no way to choose that is truly the bad actor. In those scenarios, the Court just shakes its finger at both parties and says "get along and discover a means to make things work." In cases where one parent truly is the troublemaker, that result is very frustrating. Rather, there is a process and procedure through which custody motions should be presented and argued, which a knowledgeable family law lawyer can provide aid in doing. In all custody motions, the party that wants a modification has to reveal that that there has actually been a "change in circumstances" that has happened since the last custody order was entered by the Court. The change can not be an average life change (puberty, changing from middle to high school, getting dental braces), but should be considerable modification in the life of the child that has an effect on their each day life. Due to the fact that each scenario is one-of-a-kind, litigants should talk with counsel about their circumstance prior to determining whether the change that parent is affirming meets the legal requirements. If you can show a modification in circumstances, after that the Court should identify whether the child has an established custodial environment (ECE) with one, both, or neither parent. An ECE exists where the Court finds that the child or children look to the parent for love, advice, affection and the necessities of life. The ECE decision by the Court establishes the standard of proof the relocating party will certainly have to reach in order to acquire the requested adjustment of custody. If the Court figures out that the ECE will not transform as a result of providing the relocating party's motion, after that the standard of proof is a prevalence of the proof (just a bit greater than 50%) that the modification of custody would certainly be in the child's best interests. If the ECE will transform as a result of the motion, then the standard of proof is clear and convincing evidence (just a little bit less than the criminal requirement of beyond a reasonable doubt and substantially higher than prevalence of the evidence) that the adjustment would certainly remain in the child's best interests.




Best Interests of the Child Standard.

If a change of circumstances has been shown, and the Court has made its decision pertaining to established custodial environment, after that, despite the standard of proof, the Court will think about the best interests of the minor child. Many litigants think that the more negative things they can state regarding the other parent, the most likely they are to win. Nevertheless, that is frequently not true. As a matter of fact, the Courts usually pay little attention to the feelings of the parties for each other. Instead, they are focused on what is best for the child and the child's well-being. Frequently, if a moms and dad is vehemently and aggressively denouncing or attacking the other party, the Court will look upon that with suspicion, and will usually start an inquiry regarding whether or not the hostile parent is stating adverse things about the other party in front of the child. If the Court believes that is happening, that can back fire, and cause the parent seeking the modification to actually lose parenting time or potentially custody of the child where they had actually begun trying to obtain extra. The Court is not thinking about the back and forth between moms and dads. They must focus on the twelve best interest factors set forth in the Child Custody Act when making their decision regarding just how to choose a custody motion. Another usual misconception is that the factors are a basic mathematical calculation: if more factors favor one parent than the other, the parent with more should get custody. The Courts have expressly denied this sort of mathematical estimation, and rather, have discussed the complicated interplay of the factors and the weight that Courts should give to each one.




Bottom Line.

Custody motions are complicated. Most litigants are ill equipped to manage them without legal support. Whether you wish to submit a motion, or if you are defending one, experienced legal advise is important. Family law attorneys comprehend the intricacies of these motions and what it takes to be effective in submitting one. If you are thinking about filing such a motion for a change of custody, parenting time, or any of the sub-issues that develop from legal custody disputes, your best bet is to consult with a knowledgeable family law lawyer who can help you make the best choice for your circumstances.

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Thursday, February 4, 2021

Feeling heartbroken? A simple technique can help heal your heart

Are you feeling heartbroken? Yet another relationship is over, leaving you sad and hopeless about your future love life. You question your ability to “do relationship” and wonder if you will ever be able to love and be loved again.

Don’t despair. I know exactly how you feel and how to get out of it.

I have been there, several times, and I know how hard it is to believe it will get better.

At first, you may feel unlovable, or think you are not good enough, as your self-worth most likely has taken a dive. Those feelings may reflect themselves in other aspects of your life too, like your work and health. You are not as productive anymore. Your energy levels are low, and you feel like you don’t want to get out of bed, because life is so hopeless. A terrible feeling, isn’t it?

The good news is: “There is a way to get out of this… AND IT’S EASIER THAN YOU THINK”

When I was at my lowest, EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique) tapping was one of the things that could make me feel better instantly. At the end of the first session with myself, I had eliminated most feelings of worthlessness and started to feel a little less helpless again. By the third session, I had regained my self-esteem and self-confidence. I could start being productive and start living life again. By the end of the fifth session, I had stopped obsessing  about my ex and began focusing on my personal development and transformation.

From then on, my whole life has been transforming for the better (although in all fairness, it is not always a straight line up, I do want to be honest about that).

That’s when I decided I wanted to help other women going through a breakup or divorce to heal their heart and become whole again.

Check out my website to learn more about my story and how I can support you. 

Erna Hoek 

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